004 I do not have the home, I have myself only

Xuan Sen awakes in the morning, developed cold water bath, the ability when preparation goes out discovers yesterday evening issued rain again, light clay breath is pleasant all the more, sky still shade is worn.

That blue umbrella that he has taken porch to go up headed for the subway to stand, two years ago, he drives no longer, the subway and public transportation the vehicle that became a travel.

The subway bear of early height is fully loaded with, the corner rearrange that he stands in last railroad car umbrella, when raining every time, he can use this, of that black in the home already was laid aside two years, a dirt fell above.

After the subway stops berth to rely on a few stations, he gave the subway, entered Gemini star large building.

An elevator, assistant follow closely says after one’s death in him, “Feng Zong, this is the client data that in you the office interviewed at 3 o’clock afternoon. This is the client data that in you the office interviewed at 3 o’clock afternoon..

Xuan Sen has received a data, “Of which company? “Of which company??

“Nanjing there, what this their group comes is a new general manager with extremely strong professional ability, had agreed to meet a few days ago originally, do not know how cancelled temporarily. Do not know how cancelled temporarily..

“All right, you go busy. You go busy..

Xuan Sen is worn not urgently open a data, was to develop cup coffee first, just sit before desk to be familiar with the information on the data, when he sees my information the body was smoked accordingly, “How can you be him? “How can you be him??

The bottom is done not have in his heart, before he knows two years only, I answered Nanjing, other thing entirely do not know, the cross-check that he is not at ease the content on data, it is my name really, ‘ palace wood wood ‘ rot this already the 3 words clinking dazzling in his heart, there still is title in front ‘ general manager ‘ .

He carries a coffee to stand in window edge, hoping Xi’an city is numerous the picture that make, the worry in pupil is deeper and deeper, he suspects palace wood wood is me after all for a time, the person that the name weighs on the world after all is too much.

The time that agrees afternoon already passed, assistant knocks and enter, nervous say, “Feng Zong, the Gong Zonggang of Nanjing came phone, cancelled to meet. Cancelled to meet..

Announce dark face about asks, “What reason to say? “What reason to say??

Assistant is answered, “Wanting to ask, hang up of the other side phone, when be being hit again, had closed machine. Had closed machine..

After assistant goes out, xuan Sen throws the data on the table was in on the ground, was put twice by me dove got angry apparently.

Actually, I had arrived that day outside his office, from peek of a crack between a door and its frame when me he stands when window edge, my hang back, I fear and he face-to-face chat, did army deserter temporarily then, ran at a heat building.

I did not reply a public house, also did not look for Gong Zhe, that dot KFC is very busy, I am in Zhu Lin.

Grove is located in Dong Yi road south, drive car does not pass ten minutes, the quiet ground with one god-given place is in downtown, forest is not old, build around water of a lake, sit on the meadow of lakefront, wan Re’s insular remote, very satisfied.

Previously, on the meadow that I and Xuan Sen are here via often can sitting, I lie in his bosom, the quiet the setting sun that looks at dazzle colour is lost in thought in the draw in lake water strange design, at that time, want me to look up only see him, he always can be bestowed favor on smile to me like be addicted to, kiss my forehead gently.

That also is our quietest in all happiness time, gave mechanical failure suddenly like old clock, time is decided case, did not have tick, the sound of tick, whole world is extremely quiet.

Everything stops suddenly in the Xia Mo two years ago however.

Sit to colour of sky all the time gradually dark below, gong Zhe sent small letter, saying is in the evening Xi’an great theater has a show, she gets two pieces of bills then from the friend, let me accompany her to watch a show together, I am faineant answered she.

I just rose to live with respect to terrified, do not know when Xuan Sen has stood in my back, can see he cries clearly, cried very long.

Next, take the advantage of me to return not delay is too magical, he holds me in the arms entered a bosom in, cry out sound, “It is you really, wood, you came back. You came back..

Send out from his body the body that the sort of familiar feeling that come out sheds me for an instant, the sort of sense is very facile, I cut the flavour that is his body truly, but I regained consciousness very quickly to come over.

I push him, “You are acknowledge a mistake person. “You are acknowledge a mistake person..

His rage: “You are Mu Mu, I had never forgotten every inches of breath of your body, these two years, I am thinking you everyday. I am thinking you everyday..

I feel his word is very funny, laughed, “Think me? Can when you marry at the outset, you have had thought me? Know I have many painful, you do not know for certain, you can be on wedding those who laugh is the brightest. You can be on wedding those who laugh is the brightest..

He is silent.

I think very much really cruel beat him, interrogatory why doesn’t he answer me, I want a solution only just.

At this moment, gong Zhe sent small letter again, say she has come off work, be in south door subway station me, took me to love eating sweet food designedly, see the intimate expression that she sends, I laughed, laugh very Shu Xin.

Xuan Sen sees my laugh, ask angrily, “Do you have a boy friend? “Do you have a boy friend??

“I am lone, a moment ago my friend hair comes, let me accompany her… ” , my discovery is dry should explain these with him, have nothing to do with him again, then, I keep a straight face say, “The trouble does not disturb my life again after you. “The trouble does not disturb my life again after you..

He held my arm, forcibly very big, resembling is when using a body to handle hopeless situation, catch help straw interest, lane was fond of me.

I turn round coldly, “Unlock. “Unlock..

He does not talk also not let go, to going up my pupil tear light sparkles that pair, my heart ached suddenly, voice is a lot of softer, “Do you want to work after all? “Do you want to work after all??

He is entreated, “Come home with me. “Come home with me..

I ask in reply, “Come home? Which home to return? Which home to return??

He says, “Return our home. “Return our home..

I feel very acid, but I did not laugh, the sort of laugh is a kind of affront to me, I break his hand, say, “Xuan Sen, that is your home, not be my home, since you marry to rose that day, that home had died in my heart, once, I can live well originally, but to mix you are together, I am scanty come loose in person friendly, by parental close the door on, but result, it is you let me become homeless, so, I do not have the home, I have myself only now, I hate you, ask you not to want again sophisticate lives into mine. Ask you not to want again sophisticate lives into mine..

The station of terrified of announce dark terrified is in that, resemble one honour statuary, what one honour meeting weeps is statuary, my departure also was not persuaded to stay again.

I arrive south when the door, gong Zhe had waited for me to be close to two hours, although complexion has vinegary, but it is very hungry that she returns be a care to ask me, the inclination that I try hard, place become warped to death the appearance that become warped, she laughed, laugh so warmly.

The show nature that evening did not regard as, gong Zhe is a rigorous to art girl, she says to watch whole show thoroughly only, just be pair of artists, to the esteem of show home, also be the esteem with vivid opposite.

For apologize, I accompany her from south the door sits public transportation went boreal outskirt, ate roadside booth roast meat, at ordinary times I eat the meat rarely, barbecue pressing root is touched do not touch, so, I do not call the flesh that she nods famous word almost.

She eats the flesh to look at me to laugh at the same time at the same time, I ask her, “What do you laugh at? “What do you laugh at??

She ate two strings of beef at a heat, “There still are you on this world of so strange flower, do not eat the meat, also do not know the flesh, had not eaten pork to also had not seen the pig runs. Had not eaten pork to also had not seen the pig runs..

I cannot be answered rancor, be forced giggle is worn say, “What you say is very good, nod an assist to you. Nod an assist to you..

She became white I am one, smoke big mouth of a few strings of hotpot to be being chewed from bamboo autograph again, the flavour of hotpot is quite heavy, I still can be heard come out.

She chews have interest more, I detect hungrily more, beg to her sweetmeat also is rejected, threatening my or eats fleshy or to be worn with respect to hunger, be forced to do, the principle is yielding hungry.

That evening. I took this all one’s life almost all flesh, drank off the wine of half a lifetime.

When we return a public house, already was before dawn at 2 o’clock.

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